Packers vs Seahawks

I'm watching the football game

I don't even know who I am anymore

Not Alone

What was different this time:
I was so
not
alone

so much

and though lonely
and scared at times
in this period of in-betweens
It is only hours,
most days,
until I disprove this.

In every way the work asks you to commit in this world
you are not alone

Archive of a memory's release

I rolled around in the grass, in the overall shorts of the past three weeks.

flipping over myself and squeezing my hands - to affirm

that they were the same hands who had made this work, and who had lived all the moments before this began.

It seemed impossible,

Like the time my friends took me to their sweat lodge

I could not fathom that all of my memories happened to this same body

that was slippery with sweat and dirt.

But on the hill, fully comfortable

un-phased by the sprained foot I'd attend to the next day.

I had done it, i'd done it, my body had been through the days 

that first brought the impossible incrementally closer to being,

closer, relentlessly, daily,

until it was done.

I wonder now with worry, this ideal-

Release tied to achievement,

That first time I remember feeling so completely abandoned

that one one else had chosen this thing with their whole heart

if it would be done than I would do it,

I would birth it.

and I had, it was done.

otras partes

en mi pelo
es la historia del
otro pelo
nunca nacido

Fish and Chips

Throat a tube full of toothpaste.
Feet crunched and rolled tightly into shin,
thigh, abs gone soft for winter, chest and on.
Squeezing out the soggy mass of batter,
no beer to cut the clog of milk and flour.
Fish, happy as larry,
towelled to death in the 
summer sauna mildew sponge.

welcome to the 30s.

nights filled with sex and the city
now that you're old enough
and stopped wondering if sex in the city was a better name for it
you sip your wine
crying intermittently
because
you're finally in the age bracket
where you can identify with the characters
and it's a little too real
you lie in bed with your black macbook on your lap
and spot what appears to be your first long gray hair
you would think it was just part of your blonde streak
but there's this thing with gray hairs
and the texture's just a little too different

IN PLOVDIV

In Plovdiv I was

the most exhausted,

I could feel him

far away from me,

we climbed

the sun bleached steps,

white doves delayed

a woman in stripes